If you’ve started asking yourself, “Should I break up with my girlfriend?” the answer should probably be obvious. Odds are, at one point or another, you were crazy in love with your girlfriend, so even if your relationship has fallen on hard times, you may still be wondering if you should give your lover another shot.
Remember that while you may joke with your bros that “breaking up is a real bitch, but it’s a lot easier to do when your girlfriend is, too!” the reality is that most breakups simply aren’t that cut and dry. Whether you’re still in love with your girlfriend or you just can’t stand to be around her anymore, there’s still something awkward and sad about ending a relationship you’ve put both your effort and your heart into. *All right, all right, sometimes it’s a total booyeah moment that feels totally awesome and gratifying… but for the most part, it’s just a giant pool of awkward suckage*
Still wondering if you should break up with your girlfriend? If so, we’ve got 10 great reasons why you should call it quits!
#1 You don’t love her. This one’s a no-brainer! If you can definitively say that you do not love your girlfriend as a person, nor are you in love with her as a partner, then this is the most definitive reason to leave someone. There is no point in either of you staying in a loveless relationship.
#2 Independence issues. There is a perfect balance you must strike when it comes to independence in a relationship. On the one hand, you definitely want to be seeing each other and spending a healthy dose of time together to keep your relationship strong.
On the other hand, seeing one another every minute of every day can feel suffocating for some and may become overbearing. If your girlfriend falls too far on either side of the spectrum, it could be a problem.
#3 She is using you. Women are multi-faceted creatures who can be amazingly giving girlfriends, or total users. If you’re getting the vibe that your girlfriend is more into your credit card than your quality time, get out now before it’s too late!
#4 The sex just isn’t working. All right, so let’s preface this by saying that sex isn’t everything and it’s certainly not a good reason to break up with someone who is otherwise perfect for you. That being said, it is hella important in a relationship. Sexual compatibility and satisfaction is a huge deal that may even prompt some to end a relationship.
#5 Her jealousy is ruining your relationship. A certain level of jealousy is totally healthy. After all, if you’re in a committed relationship and someone else is sticking their interested nose into your mate, it’s only natural to get a little annoyed.
That being said, if your girlfriend has unprompted jealousy *i.e. you’ve been faithful to her and have given her no reason not to trust you* that turns into rage, possessiveness, or has caused her to hijack your social media, e-mail, and cell phone… you need to reel her in quick with some reassurance or simply wash your hands of the whole thing!
#6 You fight, a LOT. Does your fighting outweigh the awesome times you have together? If you’ve become that couple you used to hate who fights literally everywhere you go, you need to walk away from your relationship or seek some serious relationship counselling.
#7 You don’t want the same things. Okay, so you don’t have to always like the same things as your partner, but there should be at least some life goals that should be cohesive between you and your girlfriend. Some down-the-road deal breakers include:
-Do you want children?
-Are you on the same page about marriage?
-Do your religious beliefs/absence of which bother one another?
-Are your political views a subject of strife?
-Where do you want to work?
-Where do you want to settle down?
-What are you financial goals or responsibilities?
Not having the same goals or future plans doesn’t mean your girlfriend makes you miserable, or that you don’t have a great relationship, but this is certainly something to consider if you are thinking about a real future together. These may not seem like a big deal during the puppy-love phase of dating, but trust us, they will become issues the longer you are together. [Read: 10 signs your partner is truly supportive of your goals]
#8 She’s all drama and no fun. Is your girlfriend the type who *loves* drama? This may seem fun and exciting at the beginning of your relationship, but it can soon get old and emotionally draining. Whether she has drama with her family, friends, online associates, work, or even you, odds are her cycle of finding outrageous things to be incredulous about aren’t going to end anytime soon. Save yourself the headache and break it off.
#9 She makes you feel bad about yourself. Sometimes you date someone because they’re awesome, and others times, you date them because you’re lonely! When it comes to finding that special someone, nobody deserves to feel insecure, belittled, or unhappy.
If your girlfriend is constantly belittling you or making you feel bad about yourself, this probably stems from her own insecurities and issues with confidence. If you’ve brought up her trash-talking ways and she still won’t give it a rest, it’s time to say buh-bye. [Read: 15 types of toxic relationships to watch out for]
#10 She’s a sneaky girl. Your girlfriend may be hot as hell, but it does you no good if she’s sneaking all over town without your knowledge. Sure, you’re not a controlling guy and you don’t need to know her moves 24/7, but if she’s lying to you about her whereabouts or sneaking around with other men behind your back, we’d call that a huge relationship no-no. Not to mention… STDs, anyone? [Read: Is she cheating? 20 sneaky signs your girl is looking out]
The diagnosis: What a relationship should be
There may be so much drama and dysfunction in your relationship that you may have plum forgot what’s supposed to be fun about having a girlfriend in the first place! We’re here to remind you. Spending your time with your girlfriend should give off the following positive emotions:
-A need for more
Being with your girlfriend should be like being with your best guy friend, only better because she has boobs! She’s smart, she enjoys the same things you do, she can make you laugh, she satisfies you sexually, she makes you feel capable of anything, she’s supportive, she acts cute as a button, and you can have intelligent conversations with her/conversations about absolutely nothing or even downright stupid subject matter.