I live in rainy Europe. When I was stuck in a rut a few years back, I had a friend who lived in sunny California.
She was an eternal optimist who told me to hang in there, and that things would get better.
But they would only get better if I adopted a positive mindset, she told me.
“That’s easy for you to say,” I said to her. “You live in the sunshine in an amazing place of such potential. I live with all the rain!”
I had Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), which basically meant that my gloomy outlook was highly influenced by the weather. During my worst moments of pessimism, the weather was awful, I had lost my job, and I’d broken up with my partner.
How was I supposed to become an optimist after all that?!
Over time, I learned that we are not our situations. But by acting as though we should be oppressed by our situations – such as the weather or a breakup – we become them. And we therefore become either positive or negative, depending on what happens.
What this basically means is that we’ve lost control. As soon as an event happens, our mindset suddenly changes.
Becoming an optimist requires you to regain power over your mind and your perceptions. If I learned how to do it, you can too. Here are 10 life changing tips on how to be optimistic.
Surround Yourself With Positive People
It’s hard to become a more positive person if you’re surrounded by negative people who aren’t prepared to change with you.
Negative people make us feel negative, and they will prevent you from becoming more optimistic. As soon as you start seeing the positives in something, they’ll bring you down again by telling you to get real.
If your friends aren’t prepared to change with you, you need to surround yourself with positive people instead. Meet people who cherish every day and who only see the goodness from situations. Let their energy transmit into you, ann absorb their enthusiasm.
Always Look For The Positives
Another good tip on how to be optimistic is to always look for positive things. We’ve all experienced events in the past that have negatively impacted us.
I went through what I’d describe as a catastrophic breakup when I was in my early twenties, and it scarred me for over a year.
Eventually, I stopped dwelling on the negative effects of past events and started to focus on the positives. Once I did this, I could see that positives emerge out of everything that ever happens to us.
I’d lost a man I loved, but I gained a new sense of perspective, as well as the freedom to go and study a Masters degree abroad.
There are always positives to pluck from every situation and experience. It’s time to stop ignoring them.
This is one of the most powerful tips on how to be optimistic. Pessimists are people who spend way too much time pining for the things they don’t have, and no where near enough time being thankful for the things they already have
“Yeah, I’ve got this but I wanted that.”
This kind of tiresome thinking will bring you down every time. To get yourself out of a rut, spend some time making a list of all the things in your life that you should be thankful for.
This might include a job, a relationship, a house, your health, financial security, and so on.
Be Kind To People
“Practice kindness all day to everybody and you’ll realise you’re already in Heaven now.”
– Jack Kerouac
Being a compassionate and generous person who opens their hearts to others and helps people each and every day is a great way of becoming an optimist.
Simple gestures such as handing loose change to a homeless person or helping an old lady across the road reminds you of the goodness that is in your heart.
And that is incredibly inspiring and a super reason to be more optimistic, not just for yourself, but for the future of mankind.
Another tip on how to be optimistic is to become resourceful and look for solutions, instead of dwelling on problems all the time.
Everyone has problems in their life, even optimists. But optimists don’t let their problems drag them down because they immediately look for solutions, so that they can nip the issue in the bud.
Instead of dwelling on the problem and claiming that there is no solution that exists, start looking for solutions as soon as an issue presents itself.
There is a solution to everything, and once you’ve found it, you’ll be able to move on.
Some problems aren’t always fair. But spend less time cursing the problem and more time fixing it. You’ll be a lot happier.
If you don’t have a clear idea of what you’re working towards, how can you be positive? Once you know exactly what your future looks like, you can then be optimistic about it.
You will be motivated to do the things that need to be done, and this will give you a reason to get out of bed each morning.
Next good tip on how to be optimistic is to forgive. There will be someone in your life who has contributed to your pessimism.
Perhaps it’s an ex-boyfriend who broke up with you, or maybe it’s a friend who let you down in a big way.
Now is the time to forgive them and move on. Although this is hard, it will help you to be more positive.
You’ll realise that they – and you – simply made mistakes, and that what happened in the past is no reason to remain negative forever.
Have dreams – but be realistic. When I was younger, I made the mistake of being far too wide-eyed. As a teenager, I spent way too much time on the Internet until eventually I got to know a boy who lived on the other side of the planet to me.
I started dreaming about meeting him one day and even maybe marrying him!
Alas, eventually he stopped messaging me. He got a girlfriend, a job and had no time for me. I realised that the picture I had in my head was utterly unrealistic.
I was deflated and saw no reason to be optimistic about anything ever again.
But that’s reality. Life isn’t always going to be sunshine and rainbows. It’s important to expect there to be ups and down. Have dreams, but remember to always be realistic.
Does “fake it ‘till you make it” actually work? You bet. Not all of us are natural born optimists. For those who aren’t, convincing your mind to be more optimistic is going to take some time.
And it might require you to fake it for a while until eventually you become it.
Put the action before the feeling and see what happens.
Do positive things, take risks and see how you feel about it all. If you’re scared of getting in a lift because of what might happen, get in one and see what happens. Eventually, you’ll realise that positivity is just a part of life.
Our final tip on how to be optimistic is to simply smile more often. Nothing says “here is a positive person!” quite like someone who smiles a lot.
Smiling instantly lifts our spirits and makes us feel more positive about life. Anyone can do it, and the moment you start smiling all the time is the moment you start to feel optimistic about life.
Walking around with a frown is not going to lift your spirits. To change a negative attitude into a positive one, making subtle changes to your physiognomy – such as smiling more – is a simple but effective trick.
Source: Beauty and Tips